I knew better...but I did it anyway...

[sandycay]

SB ~ It's so hard to read your angst on here and I totally get it. We can say all things but it's so hard to understand it your position.

NO, my EXH is not with his soulmate. In a nutshell, he became impatient and agitated at home...blamed it on work and boss..... had an affair.....left....continue affair with OW for 6 months....then came home for 18 months....left again.

BUT this has nothing to do with the OW, your H was broken when you got him and because he didn't deal with it....it's come back to bite him in the butt.

You can't save him...since my D my EXH has had MANY women....he would often get the kids for his every so often dinner dad visitation and bring them. WEIRD but my kids are SMART and they knew it was weird. He just got out of relationship where there were many break up (because of trust issues!) and who knows what else. I don't if it's him or them because personally as a woman when I went on Match....if I met a man that had no relationship with his kids....I ran.

Frankly, at this point I am glad that he mostly brings women when he sees the kids....he has to behave! It used to irk me but my kids told me it's better because at least the women know how to relate to them. But let that woman get up and go to the bathroom at dinner...and the REAL man steps out...hissing negative crap and so on.

Stop and seriously stop analyzing their relationship. He doesn't love himself so he doesn't love anyone in the right way.

I wish I could somehow channel this all to you...as I am sure people said the same things to me....and I still anguished and it was a big waste of time. Once, I never spoke of OW (after that advice) I really put her on the back burner because seriously ....it's not about her. It's all him and his broken and you can't fix him.