trying to save my marriage Phase 2

[MrBond]

"My H has now told me he wants our D 7 days on/7 days off."

That's his right.

"I supported and helped me BE a father for almost 5 years and he's barely been a father in 5 months."

Let's be honest here. YOu walked out on them first which is what you explained when you first got here. He closed himself off because you walked away from both your H and your D. Just because now you've reached a revelation doesn't make the hurt he experienced go away.

"I have been her primary caregiver her entire life."

Again not necessarily true when you were going through your MLC.

"His life is roses obviously and he thinks he's in love with OW and they will stay together and he will form a new life with her."

Going back he really didn't have a choice in the matter. You left him emotionally remember? Of course he's going to get it somewhere else.

"There's no hope left, only a will to fight for my D."

There is hope but you have to stop thinking of it as a competition or a fight. He had very real feelings that were affected by you. Just because you've come to terms with it doesn't mean that he has. He loves the OW because she gives him love which is what you didn't.

If this sounds harsh it's meant to. It's the reality of what happened. He's not a bad guy, he's just getting what he should have been getting in the first place with you.

There is hope but you have to first understand his POV and be compassionate about it to a certain degree so you can see what your plan of action should be.