[quoteI feel a little left behind as everyone else's life is changing. They were always living a life that I made easy for them, one that came with the security of knowing that I'm always here. [/quote]
i feel a bit like that too, now that you say it out loud. i'mpreetyy clueless about this "gal" and it being there all of a sudden, ka bam. seems to me "a life" took sooo many years to get- thought i had - like you, sitting here scratchng my head saying what happened, where'd it go?...
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Who's there for me, who is my backup or paver of my path, I feel so alone.
i have had a theory that when the chips are down- and we feeel soooo awful - it seems unfixable- we do always feel alone- no matter who may be where- it can't make a difference. i feel alone too- when bad things happened in the past- it was the same. so, are we alone? or does it just feel that way when we're in the pits of despair?
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None of that helps me though, huh, I'm still the LBS who's path is unsure sending me into my own stages of my H's MLC.
it's true- they've shoved us out of our nests and our lives and we're just treading water- thinking wtf and wondering if we've got it in us to get back to shore. i think yes, since if the alternative is lay down and die we'd both have done it by now. got the survival instinct i think- to carry on - whether like it or not- whether know the way or not- just one foot in front of other.
i swer to God- i truly hope a day does come when we both have some sort of awakening- know the right thing- do the right thing- feel the peace of knowing things are falling in to place- do you feel now like you'll ever feel it again- peace and certainty that your life is on it's right course? not me-
i'm saying - here's a hug- i share your confusion- lonliness & misery tonite. this too shall pass. we gotta believe
hang in there- one of these years it will get better - if for no other reason than exhaustion & lack of caring. somehow-
