Same Old Wagon Wheel Part 7

[ThisDayForward]

Thx Spartan. Try to get yourself out of that mindset. The first thing I thought when I read the aka laundry list was wow my W needs this. But you have to come to terms with you can only fix you. I was raised by bipolar mom and abusive alcoholic dad. I need this class. Should have started a year ago

[Drew]

and oddly enough my W was supportive of me going. At first she asked why are you going now. I don't think she understands that this is a little different from Ala non. Either way she came home from girls night out to allow me to go. She even asked me how the class was.

See what happens when you stand up for yourself? Even a little bit ...

[ThisDayForward]

Going to a 12 step program is standing up for myself?

[ThisDayForward]

interesting. Step 1:

Step One - Control
“We run about attempting to control others and situations in an effort to
avoid our own unmanageable lives.” BRB Pg. 104
The need to try to control the people in our lives can be so strong. We may have
this idea about how things “should” be. If only life were a certain way, we could
feel good about ourselves. So we feel compelled to make the “should” a reality.
We push and prod and manipulate to get people to do what we want,
completely missing the fact that we have to clean up our own house. The
harder we push, the crazier we feel because others never quite measure up to
our ideals.
Step One helps us realize that control over others is a myth; even though
things may change as a result of our efforts, we leave a lot of wreckage in our
wake. Until we realize our powerlessness, until we realize the only one we can
truly change is ourself, we will continue on this downwards spiral, often driving
the ones we care about from our lives.
On this day I will remember to focus on myself and the changes I need to make
in my own life. I will leave the others in my life to find their own path, even if it
isn’t the one I would choose for them

[Drew]

Going to a 12 step program is standing up for myself?

You did something entirely for the betterment of yourself without thought of how she would react.

So yes, that's standing up for yourself.

Remind me, did you read DB/DR?

[ThisDayForward]

Yes I read both books. I read the (red) book when we first got separated. My mind was not there.

I've read the yellow book once and now I reference it.

Drew it was nice going to this program. I almost bailed last second and I'm glad I didn't.

[Drew]

interesting. Step 1:

Step One - Control
We run about attempting to control others and situations in an effort to
avoid our own unmanageable lives.” BRB Pg. 104

We accuse others of that which we fear most in ourselves.

[Drew]

I almost bailed last second and I'm glad I didn't.

Baby steps.

[ThisDayForward]

Sometimes I want to slap myself right in the head for slipping and going for some loving with my W on Sunday. The day felt exactly how it did when we reconciled back in May. Oh well. Hopefully it doesn't set us back because things have been very good

[Drew]

Stop obsessing and over-analyzing and just live.