I will take your suggestions & apply them--no emails. I do worry that if our contact is exclusively kid-talk that he will perceive this as me being cold. But, I guess you're all right that even email (while was a 180 for me) would be seen as pursuing.
GAL- well, I signed up for a 75-mile charity bike ride this summer. It is for cancer survivors in my state, so I have to raise money for the cause which I am excited about. I need to set up my website for people to be able to donate. I will be riding in honor of my MIL's recent passing (to ovarian cancer).
GAL2- I also started my scrapbook in memory of my MIL. I plan to work on this in Jan/Feb. It will help me to heal from her loss (as I feel my M sitch has completely overshadowed my need to grieve her death). She was a very special person in my life.
Journaling-H came over this afternoon to be w kids. I went to the gym (GAL#3) (cycling, of course!), then went to neighbors w S to work on his Pinewood Derby car (GAL#4), then went to pick-up groceries(not GAL). Things I would have done on a normal Sunday afternoon, but this time helped me to not be around H (part of my detachment plan).
Since I've returned from my parents' house over Christmas, I have gone back to irregular & unsettled list, and the same nervous shaking I've been getting for a while now. I have made a decision to see my PCP and talk w her about ADs and/or anxiety meds (at least temporarily).
I finally (it's been 4 weeks) get to see my IC again tomorrow. I am in a totally different place than when I last saw her. BD#2 hit (I'm in love w OW (still) & not w you, & OW & I are still talking about a future together sometimes). Since then I have come to some sort of "acceptance" that H is highly likely not to return to our family.
I want to get her advice (in addition to all the great advice here) about how to move forward (w/o completely giving up), what she suggests about my anxiousness, sadness, how to really GAL & learn to find myself again.
M- 18 T-21 S-14,11 & 10 BD 6-18-2012 (OW-EA) H moved out 11-3-2012 10-5-13 Me- I want a divorce. I want to move on w my life. 11-25-13 Jointly filed.
