Just wanted to say I really love this thread and I think you've done a sensational job in working on yourself and ultimately your marriage. I wish I had done what you are doing back before my my marriage disintegrated in January 2008. It may have saved me nearly 2 years of absolute hell.
This struck me in your conversation about Retrouvaille:
Originally Posted By: banjopicker
Agnostic with evangelical roots. I come from a line of evangelical ministers and was headed there myself until I made the break in university. Not nervous, just don't want to hear about God every other sentence.
You will struggle to find a more hard nosed atheist and skeptic than me.
But... If I had had the opportunity to go to Retrouvaille with my wife I would have done it in a heartbeat. From all the research I have done and people I've listened to it seems it's extremely worthwhile and effective.
If I were drowning it wouldn't matter to me if the rescue boat which picked me up had a cross, crescent, star of David, wheel, Chinese characters or no symbol at all painted on its side.
This may surprise you but I am a huge fan of Dave Ramsey. We are currently getting out of debt and I listen to all of his podcasts. I'm Australian and an atheist, he's from the American South and deeply religious. Our cultural similarities begin and end with the English language. I love most of what he has to say but simply take a deep breath and deploy the "God filter" when he talks about scriptures or faith.
I'm working his plan because I so badly want out of debt and servitude, and I'm convinced that if we'll follow it, we'll succeed.
Absolutely get to Retrovaille if you can and keep posting.
My sincerest condolences to your wife.
GH31
Me: 46 W: 46 T: 23 M: 20 DS12 DD11 DS5
W left: 01/28/08 Discovered OM: 02/26/08 W back for 9 days: 04/08 W returned 05/21/08 EA/PA - 01/08-07/09 W's MLC 2008-2014 (realised this much later)
