Hello SB..i've not posted on your thread before, but have read many of your posts. The latest brought tears to my eyes. The sad and moving stories of all who post here are often overwhelming, but yours has to be one of the toughest. You are an amazing women and wonderful mother. You will recover from this! I don't believe your H will ever. He has a lot of guilt to deal with and he will spend the rest of his life pushing it to the back of his mind, trying to erase it and easing his conscience. I would never want to be in his shoes. He has created a life sentence for himself.
Nothing more I say except.... you are such an inspiration. Peace will come.
