you are sure right- i do think this woman has something to offer in life- and a long(ish) way to go. i wish i could (quickly and easily) find a way for her to contribute. she could easily help someone from another country learn to read english- our library & school doesn't have such a program- but wouldn't it be a good idea? corral the old people around who still have patience and something to contributre.
how the heck to get it going- is anyone's idea. anyway- i agree.
she is a bit depressed - all her friends are dead- on the other hand- she's glad to be alive. she needs to be of use to someone- that's really what she wants/needs.
I GET bummed by the feeling that it's my total responsibility in life to save her- from boredom, grim reaper, whatever.
she's (additionally) a very scrappy, complainie character. i am really over it with her. just proximity- i need to get a handle on it- at this moment i want to walk out of her life, h live, my life, etc. i'm just havnig a 'I AM DONE" MOMment in life.
i'm praying for wisdom- patience, the ability to get thru this in a day or two and continue on with my normal amount of fortitude.
just a big big "down & ready to end this madness" spell- send me a wish for grace (or something) in the face of my current lousy attitude. if i ever get rid of this cold- maybe it'll go away too???
ooooor - maybe i really am 'DONE" AND something is about to happen to shove me some other way in life- which to hope for- which to avoid?????
btw - she's home, a visiting nurse is going to stop by a few times so that will be a little "social" event for her- and maybe she'll eat a bit and drink a bit and get stronger-
still got that stupid ole optimism thing in there (somewhere). woo hoo thank you for your good wishes. xxo
