My "OW" is 8 years younger than H, and 7 years younger than me. All I really know about her is that she is lonely and has no friends or family around here. So he's become the centre of her attention. I'm tempted to ask H if he knows about the email I sent her, my sister thinks she probably kept it from him. I don't know, I haven't decided yet. I may just sent an email apologizing for sending it (I'm not really, I said what I felt had to be said to help me with this) but its a way of letting him know if he doesn't know.

Do you see any signs of regret from your H? Any REAL hope of R? Or are we just hanging on to thin air? Either way, the 180s willl help.

He called tonight, I let D answer the phone as I always do when he calls, which isn't often. He wanted to talk to me, asked what we were doing tonight and tomorrow. I did ask him if he was coming for supper (I smacked myself afterwards but it was instinct). I was pleasant and cheerful on the phone. I told him I was going to go out for a bit when he got here "if that was okay" he said sure no problem and said hed see me tomorrow night.

I don't want to be a doormat but I don't want to be mean or vindictive or cold either, I want to be the person he loves, which is kind and thinking about him and his needs. I don't want to act needy either because it sounds like OW is (a friend that knows her told me this). I read that in DR to find out what it is that OW is doing for him and what she is like. H does not like neediness, that will eventually wear on him.

I'm starting to read the 5 Love Languages next, I'm hoping that will help. Its also supposed to help me communicate better with D, she is still my main priority. When H told her tonight he was stopping by after work tomorrow she whispered to me that he said he was coming and asked if that was okay.

So we will see how it goes. I plan on looking terrific when he comes and will leave shortly after he arrives and will stay away for at least an hour, going to do some shopping. Ill go home before D's bedtime and be cheerful and happy. Its the best I can do for myself.