All of this helps so much!!! I am still struggling to understand the psychology behind what is happening, and it seems that most of you understand more about what is going on inside my wifes head, than I do....and I've been with her all day, every day for almost 12 years! It is still very bizarre to me that she could literally spin our world upside down, in regards to how she engages me now.
I am also having trouble understanding when exactly she is interacting me, and when I just "think" she is interacting me. I have told myself that I will NOT phone or text her unless is is absolutely necessary. I often let my daughter answer the phone when she calls, so she can have direct conversation with D and avoid contact with me. I thought that is what she would want, so that is what I have been doing more and more.
I am just never sure when she is reaching out to me, or just reaching out for non-sense. Not once has she called to speak with me about anything concerning "us". It is always in regards to business, daughter, scheduling or what have you. For instance, today she has already text me twice. The first time was to ask what D and I had for dinner last night. I replied and asked, "why". She stated that she wanted to make dinner arrangements for her and D and didn't want to do the same thing we did last night. I didn't feel it carried a whole lot of weight. First, who cares. Second, our daughter is 6 and probably could have easily answered that question for her.
The second text was asking me to burn a CD with a new song that our D will be practicing in Mini-cheerleading. Honestly, does she really need "ME" to burn her a CD? I am sure there are other avenues, possibly with someone that she doesn't currently hate. So, this begs the question,is she literally giving me an opportunity to show that kindness, curiosity and concern that you mentioned? That is the way I have been playing it, positive and upbeat, no matter what the question or favor, I have been trying to be obliging and nice....but I would like to know.... Is she reaching out to me or just reaching out for legitimate assistance?
