Hanging out, down the street

[JustStunned]

Hello NG,

Awwww, shucks, hangs head, kicks dirt clod. Thank you.

Some people think I am too nice, I don’t. I have boundaries, internal ones I will not cross and external ones I maintain for my peace of mind. I have been a long time getting this far and there is more journey to travel. I find many people on these boards have valuable approaches. I learn a little from many. More from some than others and apply what seems to fit. It is a process.

I am not a saint. I am formulating a revenge of sorts. I plan on living longer, healthier and happier than she does. I do not need to flaunt it. I do not need to compete with her. I just need to do it and believe
I have. It is up to me and me alone. I liken it to distance running.

Hey Val,

To respond to your question, no not really.

We are social creatures. The quality of our lives are enhanced by the quality of the connections we share with others. Others need not be human for instance, the quality of my life is enhanced by the connection I have with my dog. Lest I come off as pet hoarder I value far greater the quality of the connections I have with other humans. Some people get by with quantity. I value quality far more.

I need to be genuine to achieve quality.

You’re right I have made progress establishing a R with DIL, my GD also. She’s furniture walking, verbalizing and mimicking. She recognizes and approaches me. She has not climbed into my lap of her own accord yet, but soon she will.

Journaling:

S actually had three days in a row off and seemed to let go of some of his tension. A little R & R is always helpful. DIL has encouraged less alcohol. The upshot of which is I inherited a fifth of Grey Goose. I’ll check in this weekend during GD 1st B Day party. The little girl will be a year old in less than a week. I am still shopping for a B-day present.

After a long hiatus I have begun to remove vestiges of X from the house. I’ve started at one end of the kitchen and will work through each cupboard and drawer as time permits. There are nine drawers containing misc. items. In the house I grew up in we referred to this as a junk drawer. I expect to consolidate quite a bit. Sadly I found reminders in each of the first four, photographs and such. There were two small notebooks containing thoughts, tarot card readings and such. Like a scab I picked at as a child I read a few entries. Bad move. Doing so sent me on a brief ride. I am better now. Five more to go.

I picked up snowshoes last spring at a close out sale. These have become useful with the recent weather. DIL was the most surprised by my use of the shoes. It has been over thirty years. It is like riding a bicycle, easier actually.