Actually my bomb drop was June 15, 2011. My H then traveled overseas for work with almost no communication for several weeks at a time over summer break, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Last Christmas he arrived home at 5pm on Christmas night to join a party I was hosting for his family that day. Talk about pretending and putting a smiley face on.

But you're right, there is no good time, you just do what you gotta do.

I never said I don't love being with my kids. But it is not attractive to your spouse or anyone else to submerge yourself and do nothing if its not something to do with your kids. That is called hiding. Get. A. Life. It sounds mean but there's a reason it is such a big DB concept. It will save your life and make you a better person, and a better dad. Develop interests, hobbies, work on things you enjoy. Take that chance when the kids are with your W because you have to do something then.

You get no prizes for wallowing.


Adinva 51, S20, S18
M24 total
6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out
9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50
5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend
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Happiness is a warm puppy.