I believe I have done well overall validating Ws feelings about our M. Not just her feelings but the actual facts about our problems and my role in them. I recognize there is more to explore and discover, but I don't think I am in willful denial about it.
As I am sitting here thinking about conversations we will need to have when we R, it occurs to me that there is a danger of "un-validating" her feelings, and minimizing our issues. After all, if we are "back together," things couldnt have been that bad...thats the thinking im afraid of. But, the idea is she comes back for hope of something better than before, not to "settle" for the previous sitch.
I think there's a risk there if we're not vigilant about the condition of the R from here on. I want the M to be stronger because of this trial, like the stories I've read here and elsewhere.
Goodness, I think I just understood a smidgen of her fear about coming back.
I'm going to ask C about this today. Any vets have a 2 cents worth?
Me 46 W 43 S 21 D 18 S 17 M 22 yrs Discovered OM 9/10/12 W moved to sister's 9/15/12 W moved to OM 9/27/12 Tried to DB until 7/13 W filed 10/7/13. Did not serve. I counter filed 12/2/13.
