In total despair

[MrBond]

"but I cannot let go of the idea that she will eventually come around. "

You're treating it as if she's in some kind of trance. She's not. You have to deal with that fact that (at least for now) she is done. Sandi was great in describing how to detach. You don't have to get to the point where you tell her to f off, but you start learning how to stand on your own and not worry about what she thinks or doesn't think about you.