Changing Directions

[Breakdown]

...you are being a little pushy! I know you are doing it on purpose, but you have to remember where I am in this process.

You're right....it is on purpose. My hope is that you ask yourself those hard questions and really think about it...."Am I copping out? Am I making excuses?" Don't dismiss it without consideration.

Too often, I think we only hit the first layer or two of things, and we refuse to dig deeper to our own detriment. I'm challenging you to go a little further, to dig a little deeper.

Let me trust that I can hold your hand, ok?

You can absolutely hold my hand. And when you stop and say "I can't" I'm going to be pushing you (maybe pulling!) say "Yes, you can!"

I find I'm defending myself to you a lot.

You don't need to defend yourself to me....you only have to answer to yourself. What I think or say is really irrelevant to who you are and how you want to live. I absolutely do not judge you. And if I did, I'd also be the guy screaming "don't accept his judgment!" No one knows your sitch better than you.

I'll also say, there were times when I was asked a question and I immediately became defensive, offended even. I immediately wanted to dismiss it or scream "No, that's not it...no way!" But when I asked myself the question again, when I looked a little deeper and saw things for what they were, saw me for who I was, only then was I able to make some big changes. And honestly, those are painful times...it's not a fun process.

But look how far I've come. I'm not copping out, you are wrong.

You have grown by leaps and bounds for sure, and I really am proud of your strength and all that you have learned. But I also see that you continue to blame your H, and continue to put obstacles in your own path to happiness.

I hate to say this, but this reminds me of my H a little bit - I try to do something the right way, and then it gets met with something negative - even if you don't mean it that way...

I can understand how you might feel that way, and I hope you know that is not my intention. There is no judgment or criticism from me. If you think I'm wrong...no problem. But do yourself the favor and ask yourself the question a couple of times before dismissing it.