I decided to ask him to spend the night. I said, you don't have to answer me right away. Before I could finish the sentence he said, YES!
So Xmas was nice, really nice. The morning was nice too. Then reality hit. He left. I could feel myself slowly go into a depressive state. No interest in cleaning up or playing with the kids. I worked very hard at shaking it off. Moved around the house, prayed, thought of all the things I should be grateful for. I got the kids ready and off we went to my sister's house. I decided to keep my cell at home for my serenity.
We are home and I haven't checked it nor do I want to. I'm not at all angry, just dealing with reality. It's Xmas, you know. And he spent the rest of the day with friends.
I feel like having a drink. This is how people become alcoholics!
M 42 H 39 T10 (-2yrs separation) S8 D5 DD 7/30/11 (EA&PA) Reconciled 6/2013 Separation in works 1/2017
