Made it through Christmas today and had a good time with the kids and had some really good family time. We even made it outside and had a family snowball fight which was fun for everyone. Been playing with kids since 7AM so feeling a little tired.
Glad I bought a few gifts because W bought me some nice stuff (mostly labeled from kids). It was nicer then last several years presents which kind of surprised me.
I didn't show it at all and on the outside I was happy and having a great time all day but I'd be lying if I didn't say I was hurting a little on the inside. Anytime I wasn't playing with kids and started to think I would wonder if this was the last family Christmas together and would start to get down. Thankfully I caught myself quickly every time and got my head right but it's starting to surface now that kids are in bed. W said something about watching a movie together later tonight. She seems to be acting like nothing is different and it's day to day as normal. I wish I was as detached but I think I'm still a ways from reaching that point but I'm trying. Goal tonight is just watch the movie and keep my mouth shut because I can't imagine anything good coming out of it and I don't want to ruin what was a good day overall.
Personality is who the world sees, character is who you are
