Really good responses and posts everyone, thanks! Great insights.
You know My aunt had a pretty interesting perspectie on XH and OW last night. I don't talk to her much about how I really feel this is MLC with XH. She see's his behaviors how everyone else see's the behavior, but she's convinced this is how he's been all his life.
She see's how he's acting opposite in his choices, mainly piking OW so different than I am. In her opinion she felt that the reason he appears to put up with her obnoxious behavior is that he doesn't truly care about her and her nor him.They're just using eachother... well like it's been said here before. She took on Snodderly's perspective and said they were just more like room mates, companions, some body to have around because they can't stand to be alone, and F&CK Buddies, or in her opinion OW just "services" XH.
Yes OW's poor XH. Funny how I can find forgiveness towards a man that damn near killed my husband, yet trying to find forgiveness towards now XH is something that's probabaly going to take me years to fully achieve. I've found that I do reach that place from time to time, but it tends to be temporary. I reach that place when he leaves me alone. I've found that I can extend that peace, if I keep the No Contact rule for MYSELF and MY SANITY.
Another thing dawned on me today... you know for all this blaming and accusations they place on us about how we've just ruined their worlds...well they sure give us alot of power, don't they? I mean seriously, in their eyes we just have the power to control everything! They're happiness, our children, their finances, if the wind blows from the North or South... I mean really!! I got to thinking... Gee. If we really had all that control, would we even be here in this MLC hell ?
In my opinion it's nothing but a projection from them. A pathetic attempt to blame someone else about the lack of control the personlly feel they no longer have over their own lives.
