Sm, that's a tough sitch! I was clear with W that if she left I supported her decision but she wld be on her own (or to that effect). I told her that kids have a home here and wld never be without a roof over their head. She spewed big time and without some help from these forums I wld have caved as every guilt trip in the book was thrown at me. Eventually she did apologise and seemed to show me a bit more respect afterwards. It reminded me of a teenage tantrum where they kick and scream and when the penny drops that their tactics don't work they either try new ones or accept ur stance.
Financial support is a tough one though but in our case I cld not afford to run 2 homes so it rly was a no go for me. Eventually she give me the opp to explain properly.
Re the plan some seem to have it all worked out by the time they bd and they are gone. I thought this was classic WAW as described by michelle. But the more I read sitchs the more sitchs I see where there are no firm plans.
I certainly wld not have supported W whilst she waited for OM to earn more money before she moves in with him. IDK what others think but this sounds unacceptable and she will not respect u in the long run. Remember she is fogged out of her mind and will think u owe it to her (all stuff my W said to me and all script). Perhaps others will comment on this but think carefully before u act as in my sitch it made things a lot worse initally. Of course she told everyone how bad I was but failed to mention to them I was also repaying all our marital debts which were huge.
