Changing Directions

[mamabird]

Now I need some advice on how to deal w H. Today, we are going up to visit his dad. He said he wanted to leave at 11. I said I would try to be ready by then. He said, "what does that mean?". I didn't answer.

Spent the am making soup for dinner, folding laundry. When it got to be close to 11 H started pressuring me. "if you're not ready by 11 we're leaving. You're not that welcome at my parents house anyway." He knew I wasn't ready. I asked him to wait 5 minutes so I could finish folding the clothes. "No. I said we were leaving at 11." Doesn't matter that it's important to ME to just finish it.

This was also in the midst of a R fight that he started, bringing up all kinds of sh!t that has nothing to do with anything current. I did a good job of keeping my cool until he piled the boys into the car and said "We're leaving.". Then I lost it.

I am so exasperated, please help me figure out how to deal with this. Do we think it could be a reaction to my detachment? Help, help, help.