Things are, considering the time of year that W has historically had issues with, "almost" sorta "normal", aside from no physicality like kisses, hugs, etc. She seems to be running the depression/withdrawal cycle predominately right now. I am just rolling with it most of the time. Sometimes I get impatient, tired, depressed, but not for long. I remember last year at this time, the anger, spew, replay, flaunting OMs... is much better this year, that helps me get myself back up positive again.
I continue to see signs of improvement or progress with W, don't know the status of any OMs or cyber "exploring" (if any)...I am trusting my intuition here that it is minimal and being worked out of, if there is any at all. For all I know she is in the nc grieving process, idk...don't care too much either right now...keeping my focus on the big picture.
So, to help myself get an optimum level of PMA going for the holidays, I made a gratitude list.
Some things I gained from my wife's mid-life crisis:
-A better relationship with my kids -An enormous new found patience -A strength I never knew I had -Forgiveness beyond anything I knew was possible for me -Acceptance of reality in a way I never did -My last "big" illusion dismembered -Co-dependance identified, dissolved, now look for Interdependence -My "Nice guy syndrome" is roadkill, now strive to be an integrated, KIND man -Recovered some old parts of me that got lost along the career, kids, relationship way -Cut away some parts of the current me that were no longer working -A spiritual augmentation -A new independence -A new appreciation and knowledge of what really matters -A better body, health -A self-knowledge enhancement -More faith, and trust, in myself -Better ability to be a real listener -Less judgmental of people -Just "myself" back again -A lot of paid time off from work accrued since I've hardy taken any days off from work, staying out of her, and my own, way...
So much more to do, grow, give, live!
Have a wonderful holiday all!
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
