My wife of over 8 years has been feeling neglected and not loved for over a year from me. She has complained that I don't give her affection or enough one-one-one quality time. Due to my own ignorance and selfishness I never took steps to correct.
Anyway I discovered back in the beginning of August that she was having an affair. I confronted her and once she finally spilled the beans I did all the wrong things like pleading and begging and generally losing any ounce of dignity.
Anyway she also admitted to an earlier affair back in May as well but she said he wasn't really into it so that fizzled out.
This second affair she refuses to stop. She has said during several arguments and begging sessions of mine that she will just stop but she doesn't really mean it.
She started just leaving me with our young son about two to three nights a week to stay the night with this person. We did marriage counseling and I even tried to accept the relationship so that she could "work through her feelings" but I couldn't deal and just finally left in November.
Without knowing it I have been applying the last resort approach with maybe a few exceptions but I finally picked up the "Divorce Remedy" book.
I have goals, small one's but I have to tell you that I am really just fed up. The lying and "whatever" attitude just rubs me so wrong. I know this is not new for women who have done this but it's really hard for me to stay motivated to try and even work to save this marriage.
I guess I am posting to get encouragement and advice because I don't ever see myself ever trusting this person again. She has been dressing differently she cleaned the house since I've been gone (which leads me to believe that she has had the other guy over).
Even though I have been reading posts here and the book I just don't see how in the world this will ever get better.
Anyone with similar stories with "good news" would certainly be helpful. She is not the same person she was even a year ago. Really selfish and devalues the marriage and even the effect it will have on our child in the long run.
