YEs, we have that cottage in England in common. I actually dream about it and all the wildflowers in the back yard, with rod iron benches.
if you really are so sure you don't want h - then i'd thnk that is something major for you to know. no? I really don't! He is not what I need as a mate, he just doesn't have it, it being, an appreciation for life, respect for people, respect for himself, personal strength, humility, faithfulness to me, you get that I can go on, but I won't!
YOur so right when you wrote; H said he was down in Fl mostly by himself and only limited time w/ow. You said anytime with ow is unacceptable! Hell yes, they don't get it! My h says well I only talk to ea about 2x a wk now - so hell that makes it all F*** peachy keen! I said if she was dying in the street and you said ''good-by'' it would be too much for me!
They don't get that it's the disrespect, humiliation, anger, intrusion, even jealousy, not the she's better than me kind, but the why the hell do you open your life and thoughts to another woman. THat's ours!
I have told him he will loose me but I don't think it works. I think he will loose me before stop talking to her because I don't give him that wanna-be bad boy rush into fantasy land.
As long as he is addicted to the fantasy, in need of the image, craving change anyway he can get it, her world is more appealing. She's fun, she's loud, life of the party, strong personality, doesn't give a sh!t about anything, lives poor and on the beach. He calls a sliver of food she gives him a blessing with more meaning than coming home to a full fridge.
He has brought her food and she has thrown it across the street yelling stop coming around me in front of her friends. He finds that strength in her encouraging.
So yes, 18 months of this has really taught me that I don't want to be with my H because of the man he has become. Today his anger was so intense I don't understand how he doesn't have a heart attack or burrow right into the ground like in cartoons. He was shaking angry over, life!
Never at me or the family but just burning were he stands! He's going to combust or something eventually. He eats like a 16yr old boy, junk food, fast food, candy, and now he itches really bad, I swear I think an attack is imminent. I read MWD says mlc'er itch alot.
It's all way too sickening for me to live with anymore. It really is approaching beyond the bearable point. There would have to be a miracle, this sounds bad but maybe an attack would be just that, at least he can get evaluated, or have an epiphany
I'm not trying to get a D, but I really want to have some separation time. Is it possible, who knows, but I think it would be better for both of us to respectfully agree to do this for ourselves and see where we end up.
He says kick him out but I can't, he's sick and has nowhere to go, it will make him worse, he will suffer through anything, even lack of bath, food and warmth. Is this me coddling him? Let me know. But, I can say it is not me trying to avoid the sitch.
I don't know anything right now, just push forward day by day, try to always GAL everyday, be kind, be available, and be pissed off at times.
Sorry this is so long but talking about not wanting a spouse in your life even temp. does deserves some explanation and truth. I L my h, but I'm NIL with him anymore, that is very gone and he would have some hard work ahead of him to bring that out in me again
The past can't be ahead of you in the future. You don't have to figure it all out, just pick a direction. What's next...I don't know but I can't wait!
