Changing Directions

[RegretfulLA]

Also thanks for the encouragement on not jumping into anything too soon. I know you are right. I still am so tempted though to go for the "rebound", just to feel better. I felt a little better when OM2 was around, but I know it was just patching the holes. I knew it at the time.

Actually, I would like to just have some male friendship. I know that's kind of an oxymoron. But in all seriousness, I would really like that a lot. When I had to say goodbye to OM1 after my BD, we were very close friends - but that was it. Neither of us was available by then and that door had closed. (At first, he was unmarried and I was questioning my M). We talked a lot about relationships, life, kids, work. The friendship that we had is what I was missing in my M. He was empathetic, he was the best listener I knew. He made me feel safe, heard, loved. And I've had to mourn the loss of that friendship along with the loss of my M. Almost too much to take.