WAW...finally asked her to leave

[SolutionOriented]

Well, it's been rough lately. We decorated the outside of the house on Monday and decorated the tree last night. When I say we, I mean myself, wife, son, and MIL. So, we finally struggled and decorated the home, tree, and mailed out our Christmas cards to everyone. Now what?! I am so depressed. I just wish she would wake up and realize what she's about to give up. I say about because she has actually moved out now as stated earlier. It's what I wanted though so I can't complain, right?! I know we can't or couldn't continue living like we had been but I also know that it is hurting our son. Our two daughters who live in New York don't know about the separation. I also don't think my W has taken much time to think about "us" or her and OM due to the fact of having to move our friend and her 4 kids and mom to their new place and move some of our friends stuff to her mom's house where my W is currently staying. My wife's friends nephew has also been allowed to move back in to that house. They now have cable thanks to the nephews mom paying for it. So, now my W is asking my S to come over and visit and stay overnight with her. He isn't sure he wants to do that but he probably will because he loves her to death.

We were saying I love you to each other, but I'm not sure why my W was saying it as she has already told me that "I love you but I'm not in love with you." Same thing we've read on this board before. She then told me that the OM was looking into leaving his W now because my W has left me. I told her I couldn't compete with the 'Messiah' complex that I believe my W has because she always states that OM was there for her when she needed someone and I was not. I then told her that I knew that once OM left his wife that she would be leaving me for good. She stated that was not the case and she had not decided on that yet. That she didn't know what she was going to do.

So, I have stopped saying "I love you" to my W per the book and I have been going dark except when my wife calls and a couple times when I had to call her (for MIL needs and to make sure she got up this morning). Of course, she was late getting up this morning but also didn't return my call until after getting to work. Talking to OM I'm sure on the way into work. Anyway, I feel like an idiot for even calling this morning.

That's where I'm at today plus I've been fighting a cold all week and I'm behind in my class that ends this Monday night. I understand God has a plan for all of us and His ways are not our ways, but as a humble human being ...it just frustrates me sometimes because I know I am and can be the man my wife needs.

Have a great day AJM.