Yes I can absolutely do that. I'm ready now, and pain is a great motivator! I was doing that fairly well for a while, but slipped up this past week or 2. I hear you and I agree. Acting like he owes me nothing is realllly difficult - but I think I can do that! Where I get stuck is in thinking "god, this could go on for a year!" And then I break bad...
Everything you said resonates with me and is true. He is the one-up right now, and I am the one-down. I would very much like to get the hell out of that dynamic, it's very uncomfortable!
When I was dating, my friends used to always beg me to tell them how I could always be so "aloof" and have men I was in R with "pursuing" me, when they were doing the exact opposite - chasing, begging, pleading, and losing. I need to get back to that.
Ok so, yep - I'm done backsliding now. Actually just before I got home and read this, I got up from my computer work and got dressed. I needed to get away a little. I hadn't said much to him all morning, but I wasn't mean, just detached. He nicely asked me if I was taking our dogs, and I said I was. When I came back, he asked me if we were still going camping this weekend. Small small steps again, but hey. I decided today on my hike that I'm done playing this game of "the lesser than". I will remain nice but I'm really not going out of my way to do anything exceptionally "wifey," if that makes sense. Let him earn it back, whenever that may be...
