AJM that is deep! I had to read your post several times to grasp all the subtle lessons. I agree 100% even though I have only been at this 3 weeks now. My W who is the WAW I feel has the same issues you talk about and without her confronting those and figuring out why and how to change herself first, her relationship with OM will be flawed too, and will not be as fulfilling as she believes it will be. It is so much easier to look at the person you have spent so much time with, and have already discovered all of their flaws, vulnerabilities, temptations, etc.. and they have figured out yours, and then working together to make the marriage work. Leaving because someone else will be easier to work with or won't have the flaws your spouse has is wishful thinking. If your spouse ends the relationship forever, then you have no choice but to move on and take your chance. But, since I am an LBS, I feel that giving the marriage a shot is the best scenario, you have nothing to lose and everything to win!
Me, H-34 now 38 W-32 now 35 T-13 now 18 years M-6 now 9 Daughter 3 years now 7 Bomb 11/27/12 - OM 1 year in house separation Reconciliation 12/2013. Healed now 2017
