She came back just now 45 minutes later and not talking to me. I have no clue. Whole thing was fn strange. Almost like she left for a phone call. I wish I could pull phone records.
Sometimes I ponder sticking up for myself when she is an azz to me like this. I feel like saying is this same person I txtd an hour ago
Last nights behavior was very odd. Just how we were interacting fine until a txt came in and she appeared to get annoyed by me . Then left for 45 minutes and came back. Man I feel like a fool allowing this stuff to go on. DB or not I'm starting to feel like an fn coward. Like it is so obvious what is going on. This OM is pulling her away from me and I wouldn't be surprised if she met up with him last night briefly. I'm very angry right now. Upset . Garbage behavior 6 days before Xmas . Garbage
Here is what was said between me and her in the events leading up to her leaving. I was in the process of getting kids ready for showers/baths. I noticed she went upstairs and started putting make up on and blowing drying her hair. I got my S in the shower and came downstairs to get my D in the shower.
Her: I'm going out Me: Ok, are you out for the night Her: I don't know Me: Ok I didn't know what to tell the kids when they asked for you Her: no response, grabs keys and leaves
She then returns home 45 minutes later with mail in hand. No interest in talking to me.
I feel caught here. I feel like we were having positive interactions yesterday and this episode I let slide. Part of me feels like "in the moment" I just put my tail between my legs and said ok have fun.
I feel like I should have said "ok, where are your going?"
Then if she said "none of your business" not to react or if she tells me then great.
It is tough. She does not pull this behavior all the time. Most of the time she will tell me where she is going etc..
Again, How do I let someone go living under the same roof as me. She has told me in the past "this is how I am going to treat you, if you don't like it leave" So I know what I am up against.
Please don't lay into me about this post. I'm trying to see if I handled the situation properly by not asking her where and what she did so abruptly
Can you truly detach and live under the same roof with WAS? I feel like the people I talk to about detachment don't do this until they are physically dating someone else or have moved on completely.
I try everyday to treat my W as a roomate and believe me I don't react to her stuff to her. I do bring energy to it by posting here and talking to counselor about it. But I'm a talker. I like to talk and get things out.
I feel like part of DB veterans say "do nothing. no not give energy to her"
Part of me feels like I let her treat me like a doormat when doing above
Also. Do you think the WAS will do stuff like I mentioned above "Im going out etc" as a test to see if she can gain a reaction out of me?
I really don't get how you guys detach. Seems like lots of people including Mr. B were not living under the same roof. even 25 if I get it right you guys weren't under the same roof for awhile. In that case i would guess detaching could be a little easier.
I do know this. I still let her moods dictate mine at times. That is not healthy
Drew what do you mean by that? You seem to say that line a lot. I feel like I'm giving last nights episode a ton of energy and I shouldn't be. I didn't react to her doing it at home. When she came home I didn't question her at all. I asked if she needed help wrapping gifts etc.. The only question I threw at her was if she would be home before kids were in bed.