LBS gearing up for the long haul

[Dm45]

Thanks, LITB.

We want on needs to be met. We place expectations on our spouses. When they are not met, we come away disappointed. That old familiar emotional roller coaster.

thats exactly it. For the last few days I have really felt the kick of not having needs met. Some will disagree but after 21 years there are needs only she can fulfill. I am Semi-patiently waiting, but I hate doing without.

Try not to take these things personal

I'm having a hard time with that lately.

We had a text exchange that was a little better today:
W:Sorry about yesterday. I don't mean to cause you so much pain.
DM:Thanks for that.sorry I made you feel pressured. I know you need time. I'm trying to be patient.
W:Have a good day.
DM:You too. I'll buzz you at lunchtime? We're in clean area lots of loud equipment.
W:that's fine. It's a busy day.
Lunch time:
DM: How's your day so far?
W:Busy. You?
DM:Bored.
W:why bored.
DM:Maybe not bored. Distracted.
W:Maybe you should try to get in to see counselor.
DM:I think I may need it but don't have insurance. Yours only covers if you are there.
(short discussion about cost, church had offered to help w/MC for us, etc. I want to go to C with her, but did not bring it up. Nor did she)
DM:How much is it?
W:I don't know. Guess this gives you some idea how I've been feeling for a long time. Don't mean to be mean, but it's the truth
DMm:I know. That's what I've been thinking the whole time since this started, and that makes it feel worse. I'm sortry.
W:I'm sorry. Feel like its my fault that you are not doing well and it makes me sad.
DM:well I don't want you sad. Just want you better and back, in time.
W:I am worried about you. I need you to be strong.
DM: trying to. Felt strong and thought making progress but feel like yesterday I screw it all up.
W:you didn't screw anything up.
DM:well that's good to know.
W:I hope you feel better.
DM:Me too. And you. How's throat?
W:sore. Cough. Something's going around here.

Later, when I was in shower between jobs, she stopped by and brought dinner for us. Called her to thank her. She was more chipper.