I will read your thread after D goes to bed. H was supposed to come over tonight to watch an xmas movie, he never showed up. I don't know what changes to make at xmas because I don't know what he is thinking or what he wants to do. He doesn't talk about anything whatsoever and ignores everything going on around him.
We are starting a new scrapbooking tradition and on xmas eve if we go to MIL like we normally do we are not going to stay as long and were gonna come home just the two of us and open a present and watch a movie together before bed and say bye to "brianna" (our elf on the shelf :)). That's about the only thing different I can do so far.
I see my therapist on wednesday, the morning of his bday supper that both D and I are going to at MIL's house....he invited me, just not sure why. I want to hope it was for good reasons but probably for stupid reasons like he didn't want to spend the gas to "drive all the way out here" to pick her up, lord only knows.
I am doing something no one on here will agree with but I wrote a letter that I will give him on his bday. Its a letter more for me and for my D. It describes what I know I did wrong and my apology for it. In a way, its my "ultimatum" which I got from DR. But I need him to hear/read I know what my mistakes were and how I know I am abetter person by learning from them and that we are not going to be here for him forever as much as I love him. I've been "okay" with going dark and 180s, not great tho, lots more to do. But I will give him the letter and then life goes on without him. If he doesn't want to be a family man and a H again, then we are better off without him. It'll take time but its what will have to happen.
