thanks for input- so far- per db - my response is to "sit tight" and try and remain calm and be myself.
getting harder and harder when i know he is with her down in FL. you say you're living in same house? but in this sitch too?
is your w involved with someone else? (i;ll go find your thread when i come home later) how do YOU manage to be yourself in the face of this awful - up & down mlc thing?
sometimes when he's here i can almost remember feeling for him what i used to. when he's not here i feel mad all the time that he is so happy away from me. it's so insulting and, well, just hurts my feelings that i am so neglible in his life.
trying to keep quiet and not "go there". hardest thing i've ever done- what keeps you hanging in there and towing theline?
i keep telling myself i will know when i'm "ready" to end this all. he doesn't spew or talk much - never has - about feelings. db seems to make sense - tho, it is hard to know if it is all just a monumental waste of time and me just sucking up the misery - tho, if i walk out and am lonely & blue & poor toboot - i guess that's misery also.
it's the love part- the money i'll manage somehow - i can't figure out if TOTal LONLINESS better than this lonliness - ? this together-lonliness is soooooo rotten.
I think it's your C option- he's too caught up in all this fun and intrigue & exciting sex and this ow who (maybe) he's been simmering on a back burner for years and years.... can anyone really "fight" these things? if he feels he hasn't been happy for past ten years (gulp)since (quit smoking-RETIRED-dad sick & his "responsibility)(only sort of tho) - creaky joints-renewed tennis "stardom",) and now he gets to give himself DOSES of it- spaced out between daily texts and so on- it seems to me he has THE PERFECT situation , and why would he ever stop it or need to?
i know everyone thinks it would wake him up if i walked away - for good. i am not so sure- i mean, what if it didn't and i just walked away to the total lonliness thing-
i think i'm nice and we surely had a good thing- but if it's not anymore for him- why would i assume he'd even care. it would be one big barnacle off his hull- clear sailing...
