(((SS))) I'm sorry that your heart hurts so bad. I completely understand the position you are in.
My X didn't cake-eat but she temp-checked every once in awhile. The few conversations we did have often lead to confusion and failed expectations....
...it would take me weeks to get myself back to being normal.
... so I cut it off. It will be a year come this January.
There will be times when you will regret your decision.
There will be times that you will search for ANY reason to break your boundary.
There will be days that you despise that life has come to this and you had to lose your best friend with your spouse.
But.. you have to remember that your heart has been severely wounded and like any other wound - it can't heal if you are constantly picking it open.
CV is completely right. The decision you made today is not forever. I believe your heart will heal and interactions with H won't always be so painful....
... and when that time comes, you can make a new decision to set yourself on a new path.
How much time? Who knows. The healing process can't be rushed.
So until that time comes - be gentle with yourself. Love Yourself. Love Others.
And Live the Life that You Want to Live.
((( )))
M(f): 40 D'ed: 8/12
Show empathy when there's pain. Show grace when warranted. Kindness in the midst of anger. Faith in the face of fear.
