Coming from someone who DB'd in both situations, I can't say one way is better than the other - it's just different. It seemed for me it was generally less stressful living apart. I've still had contact with my W because of our S. Living apart does make it easier to detach.
After reading through your last couple of pages, it appears you have the right idea in that you need to detach. It appears to me you may be applying pressure to your W to follow your agenda and it could be pushing her away. The two of you may need a little more space.
My suggestion is if there is to be a physical separation, let her move.
Since I only read about the last 2 pages of your thread - how well do think you're GAL'ing? Can you do some things where you need to ask your W to watch the kids? My suggestion would be to do healthy things. I know on my thread you indicated you're a cyclist - are there any riding groups in your area? That may be a little difficult, considering the time of year and what the weather may be like where you live. Are there any other healthy activities you can engage in?
