Regretful, I really think you're on a much more productive and hopeful path now, both for you personally and for your M.
I was feeling concerned that you were getting more and more resentful (in fact I misremembered your name and thought it was ResentfulLA!)
I'm extremely impressed with your H making the chicken. I really, really think you should stay away from R talk because you don't want him to hear himself say negative things about your R. He will just believe his story. Keep DBing with all your might for now. It will help you whatever happens down the line.
Me: 51 H: 52 T: 23 yrs M: 19 yrs S18, D16, S14 (special needs) PA: 2003/2004 Piecing: 2004 on Suspect H had EA: 8/2012-12/2012