It's difficult telling people "we are getting a divorce.". You think a common friend knows and they seemed shocked. Shocked until they tell you they saw it coming. Friends help with the pain and they can see how much you hurt. A common theme with our friends is now I must be relieved
You can work on a marriage on your own. IMHO only if the other person has some interest in you. My M died a long time ago. For a moment she was interested in me. Then this interest faded over time. I knew it was officially over when we went on a little vacation with the in laws. My W went to bed fully clothed and when I asked her to wear something more comfortable we got into an argument. That night and the and rest of the vacation she slept on the floor.
She was willing to go away but not willing to let her guard down
