Good for you keeping your self-respect! And I think you're right, if he can do pit stops with you, then why would he want to change anything?

Early after BD my X wanted me to lay down with her whatching TV, but I didn't. She hasn't initiated anything since, so it didn't help US, but it helped me. Some things has to be done for ourselves, regardless of outcome.

There is still a lot of emotions there, which is why you let him do things he shouldn't and visa versa. I also get stunned sometimes by myself "why did I just do that?" "why did I let her do that?". I guess that's why we are told detach, detach, detach.

What's your plan ahead?

Together for 8,5 years.
S2
Interest in OM.
She left 29.09.12 b/c we couldn't work things out.
No signs of OM, not digging.
Living in seperate homes, sharing custody.