Blargh..so want to talk with H tonight or email or reach out so am posting here instead. Usually this does not run through my mind like hamsters lol, but today it is.
I worked at SILs place today-volunteer gig. It was good for me, but hard to interact with her. I am trying to treat her as well as I treat any friend (because we were) but I find myself a bit snarky. That's a goal. She doesn't have to employ me on occasion or be nice but she said to H that she wasn't giving up our relationship for him. I should be much nicer, but it is hard some days
Thinking of OW, i know her, so sometimes her face just pops in my head arrghh. Was easier when I didn't know, but is also easier that I know. This is his exit affair, even though he was gone lol. Her ex posted on fb he was in a relationship, and she didn't know...then all of a sudden, she is in a relationship. But that is just venting here and to two of my besties. If it lasts I will eat my frickin' hat. It is still hard, knowing he has someone to talk with, pillow talk, share hopes and dreams and I have no one. Don't misunderstand, will stay strong, but this is my vent and my pity party tonight!
What am I grateful for? Friends, kids, my health, I have a house and food and christmas prezzies for kids.
Made a mistake today though, don't know if SIL overheard but was talking to friend and had mentioned that H and OW were very different and wasn't sure it would last. Also said that I was okay and no matter the outcome, reconciliation or divorce I will still be in a good place down the road. If she listened, then it will get back to H and I am sure that will be fun...not.
Was told to gain weight by several people...made a joke about the divorce diet and said not to worry was taking good care. But people are beginning to worry and I don't want that so will have to eat somewhere fattening tomorrow. My good days I can tell, because I am starving!! Bad days= not hungry lol.
Okay, that's it. I feel the need for communication has passed. No need to read this anyone lol! Goodnight!
