lose the scorecard...it only hurts the marriage and keeps you measuring. You are now declaring your intention to continue measuring. In your mind, you will come out ahead as "the real victim"...
But I think on HER scorecard, you're far behind her. So you'd do well to model letting go of it
so that some day, she might do so as well.
2) Yes you must take the first step towards saving the marriage and being a better man, and the 2nd step, and 3rd and 4th...
mainly b/c SHE IS NOT HERE TRYING TO SAVE THE MARRIAGE...&
YOU ARE...or so I thought.
If you want to be declared "right" instead of saving your marriage, you're on the wrong site.
Go to a site for "victims of cheaters" and leave out the part about your first affair...
OR work on YOURSELF and leave her to her own work.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
