And now what?

[SM34]

KLB I finally found your stitch and read it. Yes our situations seem incredibly similar. I too spent a lot of time and energy on my business thinking that my daughter is 3 right now and we would like to have a second child, so I need to work hard. I neglected my wife's needs for affectioin and intimacy mostly because I was exhausted and emotionally drained every day when I got home. She is now wrapped up with OM who doesn't seem to have anything going for him. Had an old relationship and has a 12 year old and a 5 year old, then got in another relationship and his wife left him for another WOMAN. Now he has been out of R for 4 months and my wife is leaving me for him. The foundation of their R sounds like a recipe for disaster doesn't it? Two rebound people who don't know each other well, one that has given up a whole marriage for this. When I think of this I cannot believe why a WAS would do such a reckless thing! It seems so much easier to work at the problems than start all over with someone new, doesn't it? I mean he is obviously better than me (the old me) at being affectionate, but he will have other short comings that I don't have. It will take time for her to find them, and then the decision will be if she can leave with those faults or not.

I definitely feel your pain. It seems your BD was just two months before mine. Mine has only been a couple weeks but she seems so set on moving on and seems so happy. I don't know what to think, but trying to stay focused on the prize and reading the DB and DR books whenever she is with OM and I have time to myself at home. She is being super nice to me all the time, asking me how my day went, making me dinner, etc...but she mentioned we are like best friends. Not sure if that is a good thing or not. There is one success story of a guy who worked at being the W best friend and then managed to get back into her heart that way. But one can't help thinking of it like we did in high school where being in the friend category was not a good thing!