LBS gearing up for the long haul

[25yearsmlc]

On Saturday she asked if I was getting a Christmas tree. I said yes. She said "make sure you take care of my stuff, you know how much I love that" meaning she does love this season and decorating. I asked her if I had a tree trimming party for her and kids if she would come. She said yes.

Talking with S16 today we had the idea: Tree trimming, home cooked meal & cookies, go see Hobbit. We don't go to movies much as entire family but always do during Christmas. (I will be cooking...pretty good at it)

Thinking it will do her some good re:relationship rebuilding? (and the rest of us, too)

Well I think it's a safe idea, given HER comments and given that it's a family thing anyhow.

Others may disagree. My fear is YOU are putting too many expectations on things.'

You were not the guy she needed, for a lot longer than you've been this new guy,

so take it slow. Let HER feel the trust building and NOT have you push for it, okay?

So, as long as no expectations attach and you are JUST trying to have a nice family night,

then I say go for it. But enough with the pursuing comments. She SEEMS receptive but that can change on a dime

and the kids need to be relaxed enough so they do not think "OH all is well now? Are we supposed to PRETEND??"

B/c they won't.

So make sure ALL parties know this is just a nice family tradition you're keeping up. Let the kids learn forgiveness by watching the both of YOU giving it to each other.

Do NOT let them disrespect her, at all...that hurts the cause all the way around & it is your job to protect her, which she has not felt from you in a long time.

Sometime down the road, SHE can work on repairing the r's without YOU involved in any way.

Not your problem to fix. You have enough on your plate, right?

Okay so, good luck! This sounds good.