The house is for sale. So sad, Family is breaking.

[mamabird]

I remember my H telling me that I had not even apologized for having the EA. I looked at him and all I saw was a self-righteous person looking down at me. I thought he should apologize to me for his part in the breakdown of the M. But instead, he told me he had done no wrong.

This is EXACTLY what happened to me about 2 hours ago. And yes, I also feel like my H is punishing me.

You have to find a way that you can move on and stop being like this, b/c she isn't going to work at doing her part if all she sees is a man like she's seeing now.

This is also spot on as to how I feel. The punishing (whether intended or not) is enough to drive anyone away. She can't show you the remorse because she's not motivated because you're just driving her away. Or maybe she just doesn't know how to express it in a way that you can hear (as you said). Or both. See what I wrote to you yesterday, it echoes all this:

My H does not want to hear that I love him. What my H wants to hear is that I'm so horribly sorry. My H would like to see a real sacrifice to "prove" my love, but he doesn't want to take any responsibility for what's happened. It's tiresome and honestly I'm becoming less and less motivated to try.

Hang in there. This is a rough road.