Been having a really hard week. Previous 2 weeks I was feeling pretty good emotionally, I was liking the 180's, and felt progress being made by her attitude and body language. I think the funeral and not being there really got to me. Since she's been back she's been real distant. She was with a lot of divorced people so I'm sure she was getting support to divorce because her attitude has been a 180 since returning. She's also started talking with her parents and older sister again the last month. This is a good thing because they haven't spoken in over 4.5 years. Bad thing is they just picked up where they left off like nothing happened and didn't resolve core issues (kind of way her family always worked). I think she reached out to them because most her friends have kind of abandoned her (which stinks in my opinion) and they didn't like me from the start because I didn't come from money and always bad mouthed me and my family. Anyway reason I mention her parents is she previously said that's the only way she could ever forgive them is to break off relationship and she thinks that's the only way she'll be able to forgive our past. I've told her we'll be a part of each other's lives because of kids and it won't work that way but she doesn't agree.
Like I said just journaling about feeling REALLY down tonight. I won't say anything when she gets home but I'm sure in a needy mood and want to reach out to her. We're supposed to go shopping and to dinner tomorrow so hopefully I get a good night sleep so we can have a good time.
Personality is who the world sees, character is who you are
