TheUF - Changing gears - Dropping the rope?

[theUF]

So.

I'm in no immediate rush, but I would like to hear peoples opinion about custody.

As far as work go, my employeer has been willing to find an arrangement for time off from work. When projects are around (2-3 times a year)I may be working almost straight for 2-4 weeks, but mostly I will have the chance to take time of from work. Say 7-10 days straight each months(no pay). It will mean less income, but money should never be superior to the things that really matter in life.

At the moment my S is so young and our sitch so fresh, I think the best for him would be to continue the arrangement we have now. 1-2 days weekdays, every other weekends(with possibility for some hours other days).

In a month we will have an appointment with a family "therapist" to have a quick chat about how the arrangement have been working out.

However, I really want to play a big part of my S life.
I may be bonded to him through blood, but I want to be there for him in good and bad. I want to be involved. There's so much more to being a father than blood relation.

When he gets a bit older(at least 3+) I would like to have more custody. I'm not sure at this point I can do 50/50, but at least more than I have now.

My X is so strongly connected to S, and she have wanted a child so bad for so long. Last time I mentioned more custody she initially went into crazy defense mode, before calming down a day later.

I may have let down my X, myself and our R, but I will not give up on my S.

I'm not sure when to bring the idea up for discussion though. I don't want to wait until he is 3, I don't want to do it now, and I even think it might be to early to do it at the appointment.
I'm leaning against mentioning it at the appointment. Explaining my wishes to be involved as much as possible in my S life and the possibility of more custody in the somewhat near future.