I'm going to start with telling him he needn't bother spooning with me anymore. He has told me he does it for "comfort". I'll explain that to me it means more and that at this time I don't want "more" from a man who
I can not trust and who
doesn't care that I don't trust him.
There's been no ML for a few weeks now, so I guess I don't have to address that. I suspect either
he's being "faithful" to whoever he is ML to
or he's somewhat concerned with giving me herpes, because he told me once that the ex gf - ea had herpes.
I expect that he'll tell me I'm being "dramatic", irrational and end with "Whatever" and roll to his side of the bed.
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
Both your husbands sound like mine. Still waiting for Mr. Meanie, but perhaps he's doing ugly things behind my back.
Good luck, Mrs. I wish the best for you.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
I think all of the spouses were sucked up on the Mother Ship and had duplicate microchip implants that have the same programs! You definitely can't make this stuff up.
BeingMe, I think the reason your h hasn't morphed into Mr. Meanie is because he is gone a lot of the time and you aren't so lucky to have him under foot acting out around you like we did.
I hope today is a better day for you!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I think they're Cyborgs... but maybe I've watched too much Star Trek.
H has texted and phoned today.
???
Said the snooping he did re: FIL was very upsetting because in the document FIL accused H of things that H never did. Says FIL never offered what was claimed to have been offered and just "got it all wrong".
Really. Never heard of such treatment
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
You know even though we have not talked a whole lot over the last 10-11 years I have always felt close to you, like a friend or the way a brother would be with a sister. Of course in the very beginning I liked you more than that.
I find that I am in need of friendly opinion or even sisterly advice. Do you feel up to talking with me to help me understand what I am going through, or do you think it would be too much to ask.?
I view this as a sign. I was conflicted today about my decision to set boundaries re: the spooning vs. H's bad visit home... thinking I might be unkind... sigh
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
I'm sorry to hear what you discovered. Are you planning to confront him w/the information or sit on it for a while?
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I agree w/your SIL. Don't do anything when you are upset or angry...give yourself a day or two to calm down.
Come here if you need to vent.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
