Reading that over again, I can see the punishment aspect clearly. Think about a prison sentence. The person gets a lot of their rights taken away as a punishment. The right to freedom, specifically. He can't take that from me, but he responds to any of my needs requests by threatening or withholding. If I can continue to see that for what it is and look the fear in the face, I may be able to get out of this alive.
Bravo...step one ((()))) You do not deserve this. How long are you willing to be punished? I feel this behaviour and I know exactly what he is doing. I would do it too, except now that I DB I am slowly changing that behaviour.
You are allowing him to continue. Stop. One of two things will happen, he will say that R is not for him or he will realize you are not going to play this role anymore.
You are allowed t o be happy, you just won't let yourself. It is time to forgive yourself, okay?
I have only been in two R's myself and I will be fine ...so will you
