Portia, Feel your pain and allow it to wash over you and then release it. Resigned/acceptance...are pretty much the same. I'm very sorry you have had a rough couple of days. You are going to have many days of ups and downs, but please, come here for support. We will be here for you.
Most importantly, take care of yourself. Pamper yourself, start thinking of things that you can do to take your mind off of him. The holidays are coming, there may be shows or events that you could attend and enjoy the entertainment, make a list of things that you want to do in the next 3-6 months. Portia, you have a whole lot of living to do!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
