LBS gearing up for the long haul

[25yearsmlc]

W has been quiet this week. Sunday was last conversation that wasn't just terse details. Last week she seemed much more open.

Reassure me that's just normal.

I'm Not a mind reader but no, this is not unusual. Our growth, and our paths to reconciliation are NOT linear ones.

We go in spurts and bursts and take backward steps too.

W had counciling appt today. Dying to know how it went, or IF she went. Tell me not to ask her.

Be quiet. Stop obsessing. Why aren't you working on YOU and YOUR IC?

Your happiness (or misery) is NOT connected to hers.

Take charge of your life.

IF her car breaks down, does that mean your car breaks down? Does it mean that you win the lottery (b/c she had a bad day and this is a contest)?

No of course not. So let her do her work and you do yours.



The not knowing is a killer.

Not knowing WHAT? What does that even mean? This is a self inflicted injury.

Again, you must take charge of your life and

stop tying your hourly or daily happiness and worry to what you think she might be thinking/doing/plannning or feeling. You are responsible for your happiness. Do you get that?

Let go of what you cannot control, which is a lot in life. Focus on what you can control and keep it simple.

Back off and learn to detach...and then do it 100 times MORE than you think is needed.


Brain goes crazy thinking why wouldn't she call and tell me...she did plan to take a friend with her and hang out after...

I guess the topic will come up on Saturday....

Why on earth would she call YOU, after HER counselling?

Come to think of it, I don't believe I ever once called my h after a session...not once. And we reconciled!

I don't get it. You think she slapped her forehead with amazing revelations, all related to either divorce OR reconciling, (b/c those are the only options)

she HAD to share with you then and there?

stop with the wild expecations or YOU will make yourself nuts.