Yeah, I've heard that version described around here as well. I'm sure if Michele knew we'd be using some of these terms so much she would have tried to define them a little more clearly, but I think the whole DB'ing thing has become much bigger than she ever expected
I think she can handle it....
Dropping the rope has many interpretations...
The one that I have seen here the most, is when it is used as easily as it is said...
No more tug-of-war...
No more trying to pull, persuade, control, manipulate another person toward what the LBS wants. It's when it is more of a way of life, rather than a decision.
It is when the LBS recognizes that they can only control the person that they are, and not force their will on another Human.
It doesn't mean you give up the war....just the fight.
Couple questions for you ?
The above, where you are talking with your Daughters about their conversations with their Mother....
Why are you in the middle of that ?
Your role isn't to fix their relationship, your only role, is to not damage their relationship....
It's okay to talk with them, just be sure to only present things from your perspective. Cause I'm sure you don't fully comprehend your spouse's side of things.
There are two sides to every story. Yours and theirs, and usually, somewhere in the middle is where the real truth lies...
I am certain that your version of the truth is very different of what her version is....
And it doesn't make hers any more right than yours is to you...
It's okay to have different truths, the key is...how well does one validate the other person's truth ?
Just to be clear...
What were your wife's complaints about you ????
I dunno AS, maybe it is me.....
It seems as if you have planned this whole thing out on how it should work, and end.
I see a superiority in your words when you type about her, and how your choices are waaaaay better than hers.
And that she should be begging you, to come back.
I see a pattern of trying to fix HER problems, with YOUR solutions.
And that makes her opinions pretty small, if that is the case.
Am I wrong here ?
Where is the sympathy for what SHE might be going through ?
Where is the validation for her side of the truth ?
