Welcome to catch-22

[Big Bruce]

Good evening,
To explain things a little, it's not that I didn't want to help, but my W was really taking all the room. Being super actively concerned with the baby.
And it was intimidating because she was breastfeeding him, right, so I didn't know how it works and all.
Then I was aware of the low sex-drive, hormones, the vagina that needed healing and stuff, so I didn't want to create problems and let things as they were and did not interfere and impose myself between W and the baby.
It has nothing to do with my love or not for him. You would be most kind to grant me the benefit of the doubt for once.

Now, I will have to get to work with him anyway, because I chose to continue with the procedure for having more time with him, and I have informed W of my intention with an email.

So far, she has responded an email with indications for tomorrow's visit, so she is not blind mad either. At least she hasn't cut communication.
Tomorrow, I won't bring the subject up, but if she does, my response will be the same thing as in the email, i.e. the visitation time is insufficient and it is a huge regret of mine. A boy needs his father and the duty is mine. I want to help raise this young man.
I will de-relate my fatherhood from her willingness or not, to work things out. These things are not mutually exclusive.

I have listened to all your advice and it has worked so far. I am aware of my past wrongs, I am not a victim but I am a changed person, and I need to keep digging deeper to keep these positive changes going on.

This week, I am trying to not get carried away by the toddler steps I am seeing in our R.

Will keep posting,
Until then,
B.