WHG: Waiting out the time before D...

[workinghardguy]

Three weeks out from the divorce. Quite frankly feels like a lifetime already. Doing alright I guess. Shortly after my XW moved out I jumped on Meetup to try and find some local groups. There was a group on there for 20 and 30 somethings. The group started up but then fizzled out. Thankfully the group re-launched itself and now is pretty active. I've made a few good friends and acquaintances through that. Between that, church, and my volunteering those have all been lifesavers.

Even found myself at the bar Tuesday night for our trivia league. Finally a bar league I'm good at We ended up having a lot of fun with the three 20-something team of nurses sitting next to us. Too bad I felt more like their big brother, but it was still fun

Still strongly dislike the five day stretches where S is with my XW. Though, I don't think I've ever had a five day stretch that truly was one. Most Sundays I can take him to church or XW works one of the five days if not two.

Finding time to connect with SS and SD is still the hardest part. Especially the last few weeks. XW's work schedule has been giving her days off when she has all the kids so I see them much less. Went Black Friday shopping for all of them and we're going to do a joint Christmas. I still call and talk to them or text message them, but just not the same by a long shot.

Otherwise XW and I get along ok. I really don't see or talk to her much except about the kids. She volunteers to come let the dog out when work takes me out of town. Once in a while I volunteer to take the kids when she has bellydancing or something thing. It works for us.

About the only conflict comes when money gets involved. Last weekend I finally split our phone plans, which she's been on me to do forever. Her monthly bill went up $30/month. Mine went down $25/month. I warned it would happen, but she was still her old, angry self when it happened. A few days prior to that she learned she had to either a) change hospitals/clinics or b) pay $25 more a month for health insurance due to premium increases. Yep... that's how this thing works I'm sorry to say.

But doing ok. Don't cry nearly as much anymore... most times the sadness hits when I'm missing the kids. Not dating yet or still. Still think about it but just don't have the energy or desire to go there.